Supporting and Advocating for Your Child with ADHD in School: A Play Therapist's Guide

Joy Norwood, LPC

As a former school counselor I’ve had the privilege of supporting many families navigating the challenges of ADHD in the school environment. Parenting a child with ADHD is a journey often filled with unique difficulties. One of the biggest challenges families face is helping their child succeed in the classroom, a place where attention, impulse control, and focus are essential and also lacking. The good news is that with the right tools and advocacy, caregivers can empower their children to thrive academically, socially, and emotionally.

In this post, I’ll share strategies to help caregivers effectively advocate for their child with ADHD in school and provide practical ways to support their child at home.

1.Understanding ADHD in the Classroom

ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) impacts a child's ability to focus, stay organized, manage impulses, and/or regulate their energy levels. As a result, children with ADHD may struggle with behaviors that affect their school experience, such as:

- Difficulty following directions or completing assignments.

- Trouble staying focused during class lectures or quiet work times.

- Restlessness and fidgeting, making it hard for them to stay seated.

- Impulsiveness, leading to blurting out answers or interrupting others.

- Emotional dysregulation, which may result in frustration, meltdowns, or conflicts with peers and authority figures.

Teachers may see a child with ADHD as “disruptive” or “unmotivated,” when in reality, they’re trying their best to manage symptoms beyond their control. This is where your role as a caregiver and advocate comes in!

2. Advocate for Accommodations When Necessary

Many children with ADHD may benefit from accommodations. Most schools have protocols in place to ensure that students with diagnoses of any kind get the appropriate support they need to be successful. Keep in mind that any accommodations given are based on what the child needs. As a team, you and your child’s teacher determine what is necessary for the child to ensure their success!

Here are some examples of accommodations that you and your school may determine is necessary for your child:

- Preferential seating: Allowing your child to sit closer to the teacher or in a less distracting area can improve focus.

- Breaks as needed: Regular breaks for physical movement can help children with hyperactivity release pent up energy or allow time for children who struggle with big emotions to regulate themselves.

- Chunking tasks: Breaking down larger assignments into smaller, more manageable steps can make schoolwork feel more manageable.

- Additional time for tests and assignments: This can be beneficial for those children who often do not complete assignments or tests within the allotted time due to difficulties with focusing.

- Visual aids and reminders: Tools like charts, checklists, or timers can aid your child to stay on task and organized.

3. Practice Emotion Regulation at Home

Children with ADHD often struggle with emotion regulation, which can lead to frustration or outbursts at school. As a play therapist, I often incorporate games and activities into my sessions with children that teach them to manage their emotions.

Here are a few strategies you can try at home:

- Deep breathing: Help your child practice slow, deep breaths when they feel overwhelmed. You can make this fun by pretending they’re blowing up a balloon or blowing out birthday candles.

- Create a calm-down space: Designate a cozy area in your home where your child can go when they need a break. Fill it with comforting items, such as a favorite stuffed animal, sensory toys, or calming music.

- Movement: Physical activity can provide a non-verbal outlet for children to release emotions in a healthy manner

-Modeling: expressing your own emotions in a calm, patient manner shows your child how to regulate their own emotions!

- If necessary, reach out to a pediatric mental health therapist who can work with your child to build emotion regulation skills and provide tools for caregivers to continue building on those skills at home. 

4. Empower Your Child to Advocate

As children grow older, it’s important to encourage them to advocate for themselves. This builds their confidence and helps them take ownership of their learning. Here’s how you can support your child in self-advocacy:

- Help them understand ADHD: Explain ADHD in age-appropriate terms so your child understands their strengths and challenges. Reassure them that having ADHD is NOT a negative thing and it doesn’t define them but is simply part of who they are.

- Practice communication skills: Role-play situations where your child might need to ask a teacher for help, whether it’s requesting a break or asking for instructions to be repeated.

- Teach problem-solving: Encourage your child to think of solutions when they encounter difficulties. For example, “What can we do when you feel restless during class?” This helps them take proactive steps to manage their ADHD.

5. Celebrate Progress and Effort

One of the most powerful ways you can support your child is by celebrating their efforts, not only their achievements. Children with ADHD often face criticism for their behaviors, so having a positive voice at home is crucial. Notice and encourage them when they:

- Complete a challenging task, with or without help.

- Stay focused on their homework for a set period of time.

- Use the self-regulation tools learned at home.

Small celebrations can go a long way in boosting your child’s self-esteem!

6. Be Flexible

Lastly, remember that advocating for your child and supporting them in managing their ADHD is a journey. There will be ups and downs along the way, and it’s important to approach the process with patience and flexibility. Stay open to adjusting strategies as your child grows and their needs evolve.

Final Thoughts

Advocating for your child with ADHD in the school setting can feel overwhelming at times, but you are your child’s best advocate. By working closely with your child’s school, creating a supportive home environment, and teaching them self-advocacy skills, you are giving them the tools to succeed!

If you ever feel uncertain or need additional support, don’t hesitate to reach out to a play therapist or other professionals who can provide guidance. Together, we can ensure that children with ADHD have the opportunity to thrive, both inside and outside the classroom.